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I bet that he let it go and things be fine.
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She should be fairly psychotic and OCD would just be a huge bonus.
I love OCD's because it's really all about them. Whatever they want and whatever they require to make the universe right for them is all that matters and that seems to be what I want for them. So when I do the dishes with a green scrubby pad and she has always insisted on using one of those crappy white Teflon sponges I can certainly see where her world would just crumble.
And God help me if I use Comet instead of Ajax. Grounds for termination right there. I need you to be slim and trim for the first few months we know each other. Don't worry, after that you can gain sixty pounds but still try to jump from the ceiling fan into your old jeans and claim you are athletic, or worse, sexy. It would help our relationship a great deal if you were a compulsive, neurotic vegan who claims she won't eat "anything with a face".
Oh, except for chicken and turkey burgers. Last time I looked both of those animals had faces right before the mechanical separator tore them off. Behind your back I am going to draw a face on the cucumber right before I rip its skin off and massacre it into little bite size pieces. You must love dogs, and when I say that I mean more than me.
If you already own a dog it must be the single most important living thing in your life. Wife looking casual sex Shallowater you don't, be assured we will get one. Three months from now when you stop showing me the affection that drew me to you in the first place we both know you'll be French kissing the dog who was just licking his butt three seconds before you ed him. I will be sitting on the other side of the room wondering what the hell happened. I like to be surrounded by constant fear in a relationship so please be extremely paranoid.
This means I will constantly get to hear you question me; "Do you have the keys? Did you lock all the doors and windows? Did you forget this or that? I will also have the pleasure of going to bed knowing that we will be safe and secure because you have mace and weapons on your edge of the bed despite the fact that you will be sleeping with a six foot one, two hundred pound plus trainer.
One of my most important requirements is that you have a bitter, frustrated, divorced, what a surprisemother. She will be a great addition to our family. She will hate me instantly for no reason. If we're lucky she will whip out her Bible and quote scripture and she will insist that I come see her genuine, autographed photo of The Last Supper hanging on her bathroom wall.
She will also ask if I could fix the toilet while I'm there. Please be neurotic enough that when we travel I will take comfort in the fact that we know the exact location of every single Pilot Truck Stop on our journey and our approximate arrival time at each one, give or take three seconds. When we stop at a hotel room you will refuse to touch anything until you have cleaned everything in the room, including the ceiling fan with anti-bacterial wipes.
You will also ask fifty two times during our stay if I have the room key and you will lock all four of the locks on the door "so no one comes in and attacks us". When you travel alone it would be great if you me on your cell and make me stay on there with you while you 'check your hotel room' for criminals, rapists and cross dressing transvestite lesbian vampires under the bed and pull all the shades. I don't know how I am going to be able to help you if one actually jumps out at you but hey, at least Wife looking casual sex Shallowater be able to hear you scream.
I'm looking for a girl who cannot leave her cell alone for thirty seconds. It would also be nice if she believes that 'texting' and are actual forms of personal communication. I want a girl Wife looking casual sex Shallowater luggage, as in three spoiled, rude cell addicted kids, four ex-boyfriends and at least two ex-husbands, one of which she is still in love with and all the rest she is "still friends with".
This seems to be important. She should also have a large, extended family, all of whom will immediately tell her "he's not for you" before they know a single thing about me.
Never mind that they all will have thirty two divorces between them. I'm looking for someone who will hate the fact that I have an entrepreneurial spirit. She will inevitably stand there with her hands on her hips and say, "Why can't you get a real job? After a few months, the girl of my nightmares, er, I mean dreams, will tell me that she thinks "it's unhealthy" that I want to be with her. She will question why I don't have more male friends and why I don't go hang out with them.
You figure it out. When we first meet, please be affectionate, kind, considerate and intelligent.
After about three months please change all that and then tell me it was all pretend. Again, I will look puzzled. Please spend the first year you know me trying to get me to make lists like you do. I, in turn, will try not to point out how many times you forget to bring your list. I would like to meet a girl who can't cook.
I cook and bake better than most women and you are just going to burn the crap out of the first omelet you ever make me and then swear off cooking the rest of your life because I "cook better than you anyway so what's the use. I'm looking for someone who is totally screwed up in the head when it comes to sex too. I want more hang-ups than a telemarketer. Apparently I really like going to bed with either dead women or ones with enough emotional hang-ups to start their own re-hab center.